I have always been an awkward teen, since right before becoming a teen, it started maybe at age 12, or maybe even earlier. Even in Kindergarten I kept to myself. I preferred books, music and daydreaming to social interaction with my peers. I don`t know how many hours I have spent locked down in my room, day and night. My parents would occasionally pop in to check I was alive.
As I grew older I became a little less embarrassing, and annoying (I hope), but I still feel slightly uncomfortable at social events, although now - despite of me - it has become a large part of my work. I still prefer books, my fiance, my few but very high quality friends, and music to any new social gathering, but don`t get me wrong, I am perfectly capable of enjoying myself too!
Allessia Cara`s lyrics take me back to those days in my room, when I was struggling to find my place in the world, daydreaming of all to come, and all I wanted to do was read, and listen to music. Although I am not exactly the same, I am still somewhat of an "antisocial pessimist" as she puts it, but I have more choice as to how to spend my time now, and with whom. I try not to waste my energy on events or people that drain me, and I value my alone time, where I often sit on youtube for hours, discovering artists like Alessia Cara.